I went to Shabbaton with Rina on Friday night. I’ve never been to any Jewish services or events so I was really psyched. It was an amazing opportunity and I learned a lot about Judaism. However, I also learned that every religion and culture has their creepers.
There was a ton of commotion centered around the fact that a Jewish fraternity filled with those mythical creatures we call straight boys would be attending. Every girl was dressed to the nines, including me. We sat around in anticipation and when they showed up, we swooned collectively. It was the most exciting thing, that many straight boys. Our school had probably never seen that much testosterone in a single room.
After the prayers, we sat down and prepared to eat. The boys stayed with the Rabbi and all of the girls dispersed around the tables. However, it ended up with boys on one side and girls on the other. Who says we aren’t still in 7th grade?
The organizer asked for volunteers to pull a switch and inflitrate the boys. Since Rina and I aren’t particularly shy, we decided to go for it.
We sat down in the middle of a group of cute boys and started talking. While we did, I got a text message and proceeded to place my phone on the table. I turned around to answer a question and then noticed something.
One of the boys was holding my phone. And taking a picture with it. Of me. Without asking.
I just stared at him. He turned my phone to face me and was like “here”.
Uh. Thanks. I know what I look like.
Then, after I had my phone back, it started flashing lights. My phone goes psycho quite often. I’m on phone number 5… I think. I’ve lost track of the amount of phones I’ve gone through. Anyway, Picture Boy mentions this and I proceed to explain my issues with my phone.
“I think it’s karma,” he said after a minute.
“Uh… what?”
“What bad things have you been doing?”
“None…”
“It’s all karma.”
“I’d toss it up to bad luck, actually.”
“Nope. You’ve been doing something sinful.” He looked at me. “What sinful things have you been up to?”
This went on through a good bit of the meal. According to him, the reason my phone has messed up so many times is because I’m a very sinful unlucky girl.
And then he proceeded, in a very awkward fashion, to attempt to get my phone number. Luckily (which he doesn’t believe in), Rina had to go and I managed to escape without having to give it away.
Now I have one question for ya’ll.
Who the hell thinks that sin causes phone malfunctions?
Wow…what a weirdo…